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Ebert Quote: Killer Elite

Jason Statham is once again a hard-boiled man carved from solid macho.

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Craigslist Band Names

Every so often while reading the farm section of Craigslist I come across great names for bands. I did add “the” to some of them. Here are a few:

The Giant Runts
Western Steel (Country Metal, of course!)
Rock Hen
Sit Down Dolly (This might make a better album title)
The Polish Chickens
Devil Spreader
The Sugar Beets (Imagine an all girl pop-country band.)
Stud Service
The Silkie Chicks!!!! (Yes, the exclamation points were in the original.)
Gravity Wagon
Raw Honey
The Meat Chicks
Tons of Rocks
Corn Buffer
Goat Blower
Super A
Automatic Chainsaw
Grain Head
The Other Perennials
Chicken Frizzle (or Frizzle Chicken, they’re both good.)
The Straw Bale Berries
Buckskin Filly or Sooty and the Buckskin Fillies
5 Horse Slant or the Horse Slant 5
The Showgirl Silkies
Gravity Box

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Insurance is not the solution to the health care crisis

Presidential hopeful Gov. Rick Perry was a little shocked recently. While at a town hall meeting, the question was asked about a hypothetical person who failed to obtain health insurance, but who needs medical treatment. Should the government step in and help such a person? To the Teabaggers and fans of Ayn Rand in the audience the answer was a simple “no.” The person should be denied care and should die for his failure to obtain insurance.

But that presupposes that private insurance is the solution to the health care crisis in our country. Private insurance is a solution, but is not the solution.

If simply buying insurance was the solution to health care, I’d probably agree with the teabaggers. If society offered a simple solution to a problem, and if you refuse to use the simple solution, maybe you should be allowed to fail. But it’s not that simple.

There are millions of people who are denied insurance due to pre-existing conditions. Are they supposed to die through no fault of their own?

And what about the children of parents who choose or who simply cannot afford to buy insurance? Are those innocent children supposed to die, through no fault of their own?

And there are millions of others who have insurance but are denied coverage for any variety of reasons. Are they supposed to die through no fault of their own?

The Right complained about “death panels” associated with ObamaCare. But what the Right conveniently ignores is that insurance companies already have death panels. Insurance companies employ bureaucrats without medical training, who make life and death decisions about who can receive coverage and about what procedures and medicines will be covered.

So, the Right is either incredibly ignorant about the situation or they’re lying when they argue that insurance is any sort of a solution to our nation’s health care crisis. I’m leaning heavily towards the latter.

The truth is that if the Right admits that insurance is not the solution, they’ll also have to admit there are flaws, gaps, and holes in our health care system that the free market cannot solve. And they’ll never admit that.

So the self proclaimed “pro-life” party will continue pretending that private insurance is the solution to our health care crisis, and will condemn to death anyone who disagrees.

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Horseshoes and Hand Grenades

We had a hearing for a defendant who had violated the terms of his probation by failing to report to his probation agent. The judge asked why he stopped reporting to his agent. This conversation ensued:

Defendant (Strongly): “Your honor, my agent told me if I paid my restitution I wouldn’t have to report no more. So I stopped reporting.”

Judge: “So, did you pay your restitution?”

Defendant (Sheepishly): “No.”

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Craigslist Spammers Suck!

I’ve written about the stupidity of spammers before. But Craigslist spam is on a whole new level.

If you sell something on Craigslist you’ll get spambot emails in response. And since they’re routed through Craigslist’s system, you can’t trace their IP addresses to see if they’re local. Luckily, some of them are so poorly written and conceived they’re easy to spot.

Take this one, for example:

Good morning! My name is Lucas.Buford-tomyw . When can I come and see it? Regards. zlzmdl hwakmo epmyvc dwgptnaux klttyqni pshctot jbpc jilzckw dnfhiw vhek foixefh tgsuie jhic

What’s up with all the gibberish? That’s a pretty clear indication that it’s from a spambot.

And what’s up with the name “Lucas.Buford-tomyw.” In what culture is it acceptable to put a period in the middle of your name? And who has the last name of tomyw?

Here’s a different one:

Hello, how are you doing today? Please, what is the availability of
your posted ad presently, its condition and the final price to pick it
up? Thank you.

R. Alvin.

There’s no gibberish. The name is sort of normal, although Alvin is usually a first name.

The problem with the second one is that the writer/bot doesn’t understand how Americans actually write and talk. We don’t ask about the “availability of your posted ad presently.” We ask, “Is it still available?”

Also asking about the condition was weird considering that I wrote in excruciating detail about the condition in my ad, along with detailed pictures. It’s pretty clear that who/whatever sent the email never read my ad.

And once again, asking about the “final price to pick it up” is weird. Most ads already give a price. It’s one thing to email and offer a counter price. But it makes no sense to read an ad with a price and then ask for the price again in an email.

In a way, the first email is much better. The first one is basically “my name is X and when can I come and see it.” It’s very direct and doesn’t raise any weird flags. I probably would have responded to that one if it wasn’t for the odd name and gibberish.

I just renewed my ad so I got yet another spam.

It’s lovely…I wanna purchase.
Sent from my iPhone4

Now that would have been a great response if I was selling a bracelet. But I’m selling a riding lawn mower. Riding lawn mowers are not lovely. Clearly who or whatever sent the email did not read my ad.

And who says, “I wanna purchase” without also including a phone number or some other means or time of contact? People who “wanna purchase” make it easy for the seller to get back in touch with them.

And the last clue was the email. Her name is allegedly Tiffany Heistand, but her email address is tssbnddd@gmail.com. The email address is clearly a randomly created user name, perfect for use with spam bots.

Update – 9/28/11:

I got another doozy:

How are you? My name is Malone.Tyree_8862 . Is your add correct? Thanks. ouvvyf eadw napo mvuuma lxrg rngoh ydybly fohtm bgsvm prekpo rqcisir tkjgazm uvmkftb iqrsgzym msgvm ry

Your name is Malone.Tyree_8862?! Really? Your name has a period, an underline, and some numbers?!

What possible reason do you think my “add” is incorrect? Are you talking about some addition I did? Funny, I don’t remember doing any addition in my ad.

What’s up with all the gibberish?! Why do spammers do that?

Update – 10/01/11:

Where is it?

Thank you, Efren Bracy

You want to know where it is? Have you tried reading my fucking ad?!

Still up for sale and in good condition?

Mmm…. I specifically wrote on the top of the ad: If it is posted here it is still for sale! Do not email me asking if it is still for sale.

I also explained in my ad in excruciating detail the condition of what I was selling.

Do CL sellers really fall for this crap?!

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